Things not to say to a new parent

Way back at the start of 2017 when I wasn’t aware I was with child, I always thought I’d be pretty chill as a mama and not let people’s comments annoy me. Well after having a little rant today with some fellow Twitter Mums, it has become apparent that I am not that chill.

I’ve realised that things people say to a new parent can get really old really fast and people seem to ask/say the same things over and over. I wanted to write-up some of my favourite things not to say to someone who’s just had a baby, or even say to them in the first 12 months thanks very much. I’ve used the name Susan in my examples as I see so many memes with this name so I think it works in this post.

Do they sleep well?

Basically anyone that asks this question is wanting you to answer NO! If you dare say that your baby is sleeping well then their reply is usually along the lines of “don’t tell my son/daughter they’ll hate you” or “make the most of it, it won’t last”. Cheers Susan thanks for your positivity there, you were the one asking the question in the first place. Sorry it wasn’t the answer you were looking for.

Are they good?

What kind of stupid question is that? No actually Susan, they’re crap, I’m thinking of returning them to the hospital. This is just a dumb question if I really think about it. A baby isn’t like a pet, are you good doesn’t work for everything in life.

Is your house tidy?

I’ve been asked this a few times because I again think people want me to say “No, it’s a pig sty but you know, new parent and all that!” Now Freya is 5 months old, I’ve got a good routine going when it comes to keeping the house tidy so actually Yes, it is pretty well maintained thanks.

Are you breastfeeding?

I spoke about this one before when I wrote about our feeding journey but honestly it really hacks me off. I don’t understand why everyone you meet feels the need to ask you such a personal question. Whatever feeding style you are doing, you shouldn’t have to tell everyone. If you whack your boob out for a feed then it’s pretty self-explanatory, same goes if you get a bottle out to feed your crying baby. As if it’s not a rollercoaster of emotions getting all of this right in the first place.

You should try this…..

*Face palm*

I appreciate everyone has something to say when it comes to babies, but go away. If I want advice, I will ask and usually I will have googled the shit out of the scenario anyway, spoken to the HV or my fellow mum friends first. I understand that not every new parent feels as though they can ask all the time and you should definitely offer help but in no terms should your certain start with those 4 words. Is there anything I can help with is a much better way of finding out whether that new parent actually needs advice rather than forcing it on them and making them feel inadequate.

These are just a few of the most annoying things I’ve been asked/heard in the 5 months since becoming a mum but feel free to leave me a comment with any more that have got on your nerves as a new parent.

Laura x

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